A Walk Through My Day: Prima Donna's Opening Night

With Rufus Opening Night

I woke up this morning - the morning of our opening of Rufus Wainwright's opera, Prima Donna, with NYC Opera - and I just knew something was "right." I had rested enough. I had enough water. My sinuses were not stuffy and irritated. My small vocal trills sounded and felt good. I ate a good breakfast and packed good snacks. All my cast gifts for opening were bought and all cards were signed. I just had an "on" feeling.

Upon reaching the theatre, I felt calm and relaxed and I did little 10 minute warm-ups here and there to just make sure all was well. I drank some hot tea, got my hair and make-up done and practiced my piano bit ( I have to play piano and sing on stage in this opera). As we got our "5 minutes to places" call, I got a very slight excited jump in my tummy, but I did not feel nervous.

When the orchestra begins the Overture, I am seated on a chaise lounge alone in my "house" on the stage. Nobody from the audience can see me during most of the Overture because I am in total darkness. Today, when the work lights went off and I heard the orchestra begin their playing, I could not stop myself from smiling from ear to ear.

Previously, I have not had the singing experience where I am totally engaged in each moment of character and not in my own way or thinking about what could have been better or different. I guess I'm just too "Type A" to let it go and move on. But....today was that day. I did not worry or second guess or become an obstacle to this amazing piece of story-telling. I found myself even being tickled at times with how smoothly things were going. I did not know that there was freedom in complete ownership. There was suddenly a lack of doubt. I was able to see not just my own best choices but I was able to react more clearly to others.

I have thought throughout this process that there was room for me to grow - I just had no idea how much growth could happen in one show. I have vocally found different places of my voice that I did not know were there - strength that I did not know existed and vulnerability that has lent itself to true expression on stage.

Meeting the legendary Yoko Ono

Meeting one of my heroes, Susan Sarandon

At the end of the performance, we all toasted Rufus and the entire team that made this opera happen.  I went home to rest for a bit before going out from Brooklyn to Manhattan for Rufus' after party. The gathering was at German restaurant later in the evening and I originally thought that I'd be too tired to attend at all. I decided to go for just an hour or so.

As I walked in, I found Rufus and went up to him to say hello and let him know that I made it. I saw a woman in a pill-box hat decorated with a feather seated next to him and, suddenly, this face turns around to smile at me and I realize that it's Yoko Ono! As I start to look around the table, there's Sean Lennon, Chloe Sevigny and Parker Posey. I tried not to just let my jaw drop. Next, Rufus said, "Come meet Susan." I'm looking at the back of a wavy-red head and Susan Sarandon turns around and begins going on and on about the opera and how much she loved it. We ended up having a very good conversation about my character in the opera, Rufus' first attempt at opera, the state of affairs in opera finances and ... well, just opera in general. Similarly, I found that many of these people we might consider untouchable were ultimately approachable and interested in the art form of opera. Sean Lennon, outside the restaurant as I was leaving, talked to me for at least 10 minutes on how refreshing it was to see our opera, with its small cast and sparse set design, focusing on the characters as one would do in live theatre.

With our Conductor Jayce Ogren and Charlotte Dobbs

What a wonderful day and night and what a wonderful example that, when one least expects it, there is confidence and support and interest from every direction. I think I may try this "getting out of my own way" thing more often.